Rockin' Christmas Books 2: "No Regrets" by Ace Frehley

In the early 1970s American rock 'n roll was at a shockingly low ebb. Few of the superstars who ruled the heights of Woodstock survived into the following decade. New harder acts like The Stooges and Alice Cooper showed the way of the future but had little impact within the mainstream. From 1970 to 1973 British bands ruled the States - The Who, Stones, Yes, and (of course) Led Zeppelin. Then, astoundingly, the USA produced two bands who became primary influences on mainstream rock for the next two decades - Aerosmith and KISS.

Between them, Joe Perry and Ace Frehley encouraged a generation of teenage boys (who otherwise would have become climate scientists or health care professionals) to spend hours striking rockstar poses in front of their bedroom mirrors. Perry and Frehley took the blues-rock of the 60s British superstars (Peter Green, Mick Taylor, Clapton, Townshend, etc) and gave it a major American shot of adrenaline and glitz. While Perry has so far elected to Let The Music Do The Talking, Ace has recently shed some light on his glorious and alcohol-soaked career.

Let me start with some of the same gripes that I had about Tony Iommi's book. First up, No Regrets has to be one of the most unimaginative titles ever presented. It appears to have no reference to Ace's career. I can think of several better titles off the top of my head - Trouble Walkin', Insane, even Rock Soldier. It's the same Work Experience Kid doing the cover as well - boring fonts, boring pictures. Most unattractive.

These flaws are easily forgiven, however, because Ace Frehley is one hell of a storyteller! This book has everything the serious (or even casual) fan of KISS could want. KISS were never a band to do things by half, collectively and individually. Each of the four original members were given licence by their fame to indulge in their passions. For Ace, this involved alcohol, drugs, fast cars, and card games. In the midst of it all we have the story (from Ace's perspective) of the band who gave the world some of the greatest rock riffs of all time.

Unlike Iommi, Ace Frehley has no problem with exposing his own faults and failings. Car chases and accidents are recounted in gory detail. The reader learns that Frehley was (twice) saved from drowning while under the influence of alcohol by the eternally sober Gene Simmons. Many other stories of life on the road and experiences in the studio permeate the narrative. It is a gripping tale from first to last.

Of course, no great tale is complete without a great villain. Frehley's nemesis, unsurprisingly, is the driven bassist Simmons, who in the past has had some blunt assessments of the impact of Frehley's addictions on the well-being of the KISS brand. The animosity between the two dates to their first meeting, but neither could deny the chemistry that Frehley brought to the band. One of Frehley's aims in publishing this book is to directly refute some of the barbs that have come from Simmons over the years, as well as firing a few return shots of his own.

Of course, the book isn't perfect. Frehley does gloss over the less glamorous period of the late 1980s and dire predicament his career was in by the time of the reunion of KISS in 1996. Additionally, readers may be somewhat alarmed that he firmly believes he was abducted by aliens. Yes, you read that right. This story first came out during an interview on the Eddie Trunk radio show about five years ago, where a clearly drunk Frehley related a tale of strange lights in his backyard to a bewildered and increasingly uncomfortable Trunk. Amazingly, he does not back down from the story (or even consider the possibility that it may have been a tequila-induced hallucination. What this does to the credibility of the rest of the narrative is a matter of individual judgment.

On the whole, No Regrets is a much more satisfying account of the story of KISS than the highly airbrushed "official" accounts currently on offer. In addition, the reader gains an insight into the mind of one of the true legends of rock guitar. Highly recommended.

Four bottles of Cold Gin out of Five.

Rockin' Christmas Books 1: "Iron Man" by Tony Iommi

The approaching festive season for me (and many others) usually means Books. Books as presents, books for presents, books to divert the kids, books to prop open doors/windows, etc. Many of my clerical colleagues no doubt use the slower pace of the post-Christmas period to read some of the serious theological works published in the previous 12 months that have joined the rapidly growing Must Read List. I hope to do a bit of that as well. But I also like to relax a bit and so I require books that Rock! Or rather, I love books about People Who Rock.

One of my more popular posts was this from last year, which described the various types of musical biography out there (along with some of my favourites). Well, now that I've cleared the path for you, I thought I'd devote a few posts over the next week or so to some of the latest offerings in the Rock Biography genre which you may be tempted for that Special Headbanging Someone this Christmas.

First up: Iron Man by Tony Iommi.

Iommi is the guitarist in Black Sabbath, whose detuned riffing and blistering solos gave birth to the genre of Heavy Metal. He has also shared the stage with some of the most prominent, talented, and controversial figures in rock music. Tony should have a bunch of good stories up his sleeve.

I'll get my biggest gripe out of the way first - the graphic design of this book is TERRIBLE! Front cover is a close up of Tony's face with unimaginative block lettering down the bottom. For some reason the "M" in "Man" is written in Iron Maiden script. Huh??? Given that Sabbath weren't short of good fonts on their album covers surely it couldn't have been too hard to use something that even vaguely embodied the band the author actually played in. Seriously, they either gave this cover to the Work Experience Kid or (more likely) the publisher had to put out something in a hurry to meet a deadline. Given that Sabbath announced their comeback album and tour a couple of weeks ago I get the impression that time wasn't a luxury.

Of course, we can't judge a book by the cover, and surely once we get inside Tony will keep us enthralled with tales of Excess On The Road...

Well, yes and no. Tony gives us his perspective on Sabbath's long and controversial career, and that alone makes the book important. He has chosen to construct his memoir as a chronological series of anecdotes. Each chapter runs about 3-5 pages and is presented in a conversational style, which is helpful for those (like Ozzy) with ADHD, but more than a little frustrating for anyone who graduated primary school. At best, it feels like you are sharing a pint or 60 down the pub with Tony while he shares his Best Recollections. Actually, if the publisher had framed the book in that way it would have been a much more enjoyable read. Tony has been presented by bandmates past and present as being little more than a Control Freak, and he takes the opportunity here to answer his critics and provide his side of the story. He even comes off as moderately likeable and I even found myself thinking, "I reckon I could have been in a band with this guy. He's just misunderstood." Nevertheless, Iron Man lacks two things that could have turned it from Decent Read to Quality Memoir.

Lack #1 - Effort. This book feels like someone pressed the Record button, transcribed the results, and stuck a cheap-ass cover on it. Not everyone is going to go to the level of Nikki Sixx, whose Heroin Diaries were a work of art as well as being hilarious and revolting. But even those who have followed a more traditional format (Steve Tyler, David Lee Roth, Tommy Lee, Anthony Kiedis, etc) have made sure that the reader walks away with more than a collection of short stories. Again, perhaps time pressures were an issue and Tony didn't get to realise his vision. That said, Tony has held the status of Rock Legend for several decades now - this book was going to come out sooner or later and Tony had plenty of time (in the last decade in particular) to have cobbled together something a little better than this.

Lack #2 - Juiciness. You know those cakes you sometimes get at the houses of Old People, that dry sponge with no icing that you need two pots of tea to wash down? Imagine that in book form. Black Sabbath was a band whose level of craziness on the road was at least a match for Led Zeppelin. Ozzy Osbourne has boasted that while in Sabbath he took LSD for a year just to see what would happen. You would think Tony would have some fantastic tales to tell. Well, he does, but in this instance he is keeping his mouth shut. Sure there is the occasional road story, but most are fairly tame and if you are even moderately acquainted with Ozzy and the boys you will have heard much worse elsewhere. Either Tony is so ashamed of his and others' behaviour that he has chosen to expunge it from the record (unlikely) OR the cordial (and profitable) relationship that he has re-established with the Osbourne camp (re: Sharon) and the potential for future earnings meant that he chose to keep many such stories under wraps. As such, there is no REAL insight into what it was like to be in Black Sabbath during the glory days of 1969-1983. Sure, the comings and goings of musicians and managers is documented accurately and each album is analysed for its merits (or lack thereof). The keen fan will already be aware of much of this, and will probably come away with amazement that Tony chose to keep flogging the dead horse for so long.

To be fair, maybe one of Tony's problems is that he is English, a race not known for self-examination and public confession. Even the working class of Birmingham, it seems, retain a Stiff Upper Lip at all times. In my experience, works on English musicians tend to work best when someone else is observing and interpreting the events and characters. Chris Welch's biography of Yes was a great example of a trusted insider getting notoriously reticent British musicians to say what they really thought about each other. Because Iron Man is totally Tony's story there is no-one to probe his inconsistencies and get beyond a purely subjective re-reading of events.

Fans of heavy metal and those new to the Black Sabbath story enjoy Iron Man. Despite its shortcomings it is not a bad book and gives a useful overview of the progress of such an important band from the perspective of its main creative voice. However, hardcore fans will be disappointed by its shortcomings and won't easily forgive the lack of detail regarding the band's most sordid periods.

2.5 War Pigs out of 5.

A Music Biography Spotters Guide

During a recent stroll through my local bookstore (not that I've had much time for recreational reading lately) I noticed the new Metallica biography was instore and made a mental note to purchase. This had me thinking that this type of tome was just the sort of thing that could easily end up in Christmas stockings within the coming month. It also occurred to me that as so many different types of music biographies exist in the world these days the novice might have difficulty in distinguishing the Good from the Bad or Ugly. As a conni-sewer of the genre, I hereby offer a quick guide to the types of music books likely to be found at your local vendor and some of the pros and cons associated with each.

The Authorised Biography
Sometimes labelled 'The Official Story of...' type. In this model an authorised voice (either a journalist or an employee of the artist) presents a history from the artist's point of view. Such a biography can be a useful source of information, particularly on early history and fun anecdotes from the road/studio. However, the downside is that controversies and conflicts can be downplayed or glossed over to the point of driving true fans to the point of insanity. If anyone presents you with The Official Authorized Biography of KISS it should be filed with the matches beside the fireplace.

The Unauthorised Biography
Composed with little (or no) cooperation from the artist or their management/record company. Well established facts are rehashed and vast amounts of speculation are entered into based on gutter journalism of the worst kind and witnesses that rarely stand close scrutiny. At best a few salient observations are made. Approach with caution.

The Tour Diary
Probably my favourite type. A particular album-tour period is taken in great detail. Lots of observations of the artists in situ. Casual conversations recounted verbatim. Side characters become personalities of their own. The artist becomes an actor in a production bigger than themselves that remains hidden from the audience. Cracks appear and myths are challenged. Robert Greenfield's A Journey Through America with the Rolling Stones and Ratso Sloane's On The Road with Bob Dylan are classics and should be in every serious music fan's library. Be aware, however, that the author is usually a willing participant in backstage antics including the consumption of (shock horror!) illicit substances that may or may not cloud their recollections.

The Group Effort
This is a format that has come into play since the late 90s and there should be more of them. Usually works for a band with strong personalities. Each member gives an independent account of the history to a coordinating writer who then takes portions from each to weave together a narrative. This can have interesting results when the recollections don't quite match up and the reader must make up their own mind. The Dirt by Motley Crue is a must-have in this category.

The Insider Out
A band member takes it upon themselves to 'tell their side of the story'. If the band member is a reputable character this can give a perpective on band dimensions that would never see the light of day. Stone Alone by Bill Wymann is particularly good despite now being 20 years old owing to Bill's obsessive-compulsive nature on keeping a copy of every bit of paper to do with the band. I see that Steve Adler from Guns 'n Roses has his book out now. I am less optimistic about his recollections.

The Outsider In
Not the artist themselves but a 'trusted insider' tells their story of life in the rock 'n roll world. The characters of the artists are observed over a long period and events are reported from an 'objective' veiwpoint. Some of these accounts can be tawdry, vindictive, or wildly inaccurate. Tony Sanchez's account of life with Keith Richards is all of the above. On the other hand stories can be told with a lot of both love and honesty. Richard Cole's Stairway To Heaven should be taken very seriously, as should Steve Parish's Home Before Daylight.

These represent the major categories. There will always be variations on the themes and additional works, particularly with the more 'cerebral' artists who tend to attract a fair amount of socio-rhetorical criticism (if you're into that sort of thing). Remember also that music biographies always operate under the 'when the legend becomes fact, print the legend' mentality. Happy reading!